Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now
1. What happened? yeah, i went away for 7 weeks…and I was scared. I was so scared that I was going to come back and you were going to treat me like nothing. And that’s exactly what happened. What happened to all of those texts saying everything would be the same when I got home? And that you would never abandon me? I have them all written down and reading them at night just makes it harder. What happened to those sparks? You won’t even make en effort to hang out with me and I haven’t seen you in over 2 months. That’s awesome. I understand that you’re busy but why can’t we work around our schedule? I’m always on your side. You don’t even make an effort anymore the way you used to and I feel alone. I’m not ready to let go of you at ALL..but I’m not sure this is working out like I planned. Too bad I’m afraid to tell all of this to you.
2. Loosing you was the worst thing that happened in my whole entire life. You were a second mom to me and we were more alike than 2 people could be. You taught me lessons in life that I will never forget and I have memories with you that will always stay in my heart. Thinking about you and where you could be makes me want to bawl my eyes out..but I hope God is taking good care of you. <3
3. You make me sick. What is wrong with you? Invading my privacy? I love you to pieces and I appreciate everything that you’ve done for me, I honestly do. But you cross the line. ALL the time. I have no respect for your actions and when you yell at me it just goes straight through. Doesn’t effect me in the slightest bit…hopefully we can get back to that relationship we both loved and both lost.
4. You are SUCH a great person. But I feel like I’m the only person recognizing this in you. You’re mixing up cockiness with self- confidence and if you just respected people a lot more, i know everyone would like you. Stop making pissy comments that perceive that you think you’re better than people..because you’re not. I love you though, you make me laugh out loud :)
5. We have gotten so close this past year. I can honestly say that I trust you with a whole lot and being with you is just having a fun time. You stick up for me and you always give me the best advice. Thank you so much for everything<3
6. Get out of my freaking head!!!!!!!!!!!! I have no clue why you’re still in here. Honestly, you are so nasty to me and you can’t even answer a simple question without trying to play games with me. You DID like me and you admitted it like 2 years ago..I know that you and I have always had chemistry no matter how many times you deny it. And I know your friends don’t like me.. WHO CARES. Create your own opinions. Now though you’re just rude..you don’t have to like me but at least be polite. I do love you and that’s not going to change no matter how bad you treat me.
7. This is pretty random…but wow, I feel incredibly bad for you. I know that you don’t like me and I know that you talk about me to other people..word spreads..but what your boyfriend did to you was awful. What do you expect? He’s a huge flirter. But after reading your blog, I felt really bad. I kind of actually understand you better. But I wish you knew more about me before judging.
8. I’m really sorry that we don’t have that special connection, I really am. Because I know that on the day you die I will regret spending every possible moment with you. I just don’t know how to be there..we are two completely different people. It’s just hard.
9. I love you. You’re a huge part of ME. I just wish that we met. Even if it was for 5 minutes.
10. I miss you. I’ll admit it, walking past a juicy couture perfume booth makes me think back to all of our memories. Going snowboarding for the first time together, cooking spanish food together, sharing secrets, everything. I think what happened was just an unfortunate situation but it was neither one of our faults and you’re putting all of it on me. You can’t just block someone out and try to pretend that they’re not alive, because i am. I’m alive and part of me does love you. Just move on from it, already it’s not even a big deal. Oh yeah- I’m in your Spanish class too.